Author Topic: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread  (Read 2702 times)

Offline ocdnetadmin

  • Administrator
  • Full Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 171
  • admin
    • View Profile
Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« on: September 13, 2017, 03:00:50 AM »
Hey OCDNET community, I'm Alan, the forum creator, and I figured it was time to create my own thread (and keep it updated). As the forum admin I feel I haven't contributed as much as I should have so I'm here to fix that, share my life, and get to know you guys better.
First I just wanted to say hi and thank you all for being the most supportive and knowledgeable group out there. Without this forum, without you guys to talk to, I don't know where I'd be in my OCD journey.

So, some of you may not know me, or why I started OCD.net, (too lazy to type the whole thing).
I started this forum about 5 years ago when I thought the rules and restrictions on other health boards were too draconian. I wanted an unfiltered, devoted site to OCD injuries so I went ahead and created it. But that was the easy part. And Besides maintain and pay for the forum I really haven't done much. The community has contributed way more than I ever have and really made this forum the informative, supportive place it has become.

As for my personal injury, I don't even know where my original thread is, but my ocd is on my left ankle, two holes, medium size. I had microfracture and it didn't go that well. Ankle still feels quite weak. That was almost 10 years ago and I just kinda get by in life. I didn't run or jump for all those years after the microfracture because my ankle just couldn't handle it. Thank god I could walk but if it was long distances and if i was carrying something heavy my ankle got really iffy and sore.

Dealing with the injury was more than I could handle. I gave up. I honestly stopped doing research for years. It was this forum's members who really put in a lot of the hard work (again, thank you all for your contributions, I love you).
So where I am now is that I feel more surgeries are too risky and plus I don't have the money for them anyways. So that's another reason to be lazy about research.

A few months ago, I joined a gym that had a basketball court and I started shooting around. Basketball was my old passion and though I couldn't play, just shooting the ball didn't hurt my ankle that bad. SO i shot around for 3 months, and then one day at a different gym, there were people playing and they asked if i wanted to play. Normally I'd decline and tell them I was injured, but I don't know what came over me to say yes. I hadn't played in like.. 9 years. I think I was just a bit depressed or lost in my life and I was like F*** it, I want to play, let's just try and see what happens.

So I can't play like I used to obviously, but I found that by moving around carefully and not jumping or running around like a madman I could get by without being the worst player on the court. A few days later, I played again. And it felt so freaking amazing. I felt so alive. I did mess up my ankle a bit but it was so worth it.

And since then, i have been playing a few times a week. My ankle hurts afterwards but i take a rest for a few days and then I can't help but play again.

I don't really know where i'm going with this, just wanted to share that maybe i feel a little bit of the pain and struggle you guys go through to have to cut off your passions in life. I know i have said to some ppl to give up on their athletic dreams. But maybe there's a compromise. This is our life goddamnit, you know? We have to do the things that make us feel alive and free.

So, that's my update. I will try to post more about myself and what I'm going through and I look forward to interacting more with you guys.

Thanks for reading.
-Alan


Offline ocdnetadmin

  • Administrator
  • Full Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 171
  • admin
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #1 on: September 16, 2017, 09:51:36 PM »
So I played basketball two days in a row, then went on a hike today.
Ankle is very tender and sore.
I probably can't play ball anymore, ankle just keeps getting more and more unstable the more I subject it to jumping and running around

Surprisingly, hiking isn't terrible for my ankle, as long as I don't do it too much. However, the risk of spraining my ankle is incredibly high when hiking over unstable, uneven rocks, so there is that large risk.

Offline ocdnetadmin

  • Administrator
  • Full Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 171
  • admin
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2017, 03:56:55 PM »
I did 8 hours of hiking yesterday and my ankle is completely destroyed today. If my ankle can recover it will have been worth it but I can't do that kind of hiking again.

Offline Namelike

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 75
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #3 on: October 07, 2017, 09:18:39 PM »
Alan, I’m sorry to hear all the trouble you’re going through but congrats on actually making it back on to the court. That must have been exhilarating. I have completely eliminated sports from my life but yesterday I went and just shot basketballs without jumping and it was surprisingly fun! Your post kind of motivated me to do it. And then every time I air balled I did 10 push-ups haha. Maybe you could get back into athletic things like kayaking, rock climbing, etc. that are good substitutions but not a strain on your ankle.

If you are still in pain it may really be worth getting back to the surgeon or getting a second opinion to try and fix this. My cartilage has held up 3 years post op and now I’m on PT for tendonitis / nerve impingement due to walking weirdly since surgery.

Offline ocdnetadmin

  • Administrator
  • Full Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 171
  • admin
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #4 on: October 08, 2017, 01:07:34 AM »
I played ball again, a few days after the last hike. Played about 30 minutes , not that hard. Ankle had slight pain/soreness afterwards but felt OK, didn't push it too hard. If i went longer it would have been worse pain.


So far I think I am in a steady pattern. I can play every 3-4 days for not longer than 30 minutes and ankle should hold up (until it doesn't)

Offline DVJohn

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 3
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #5 on: October 29, 2017, 05:41:26 AM »
Hi Alan,

I just joined in the group due to my recent OCD which I had no idea about 4 mons ago.
Have been in vain so far when I realized that my sport life almost ended
I just knew you have undergone quite long and hard time since your first surgery.
I not decided yet which path to move on, but I will skip over MF. Hence my last chance here would only be OATS. I will move on and still dream of a chance returning to sport at some extent
I see quite many options for you guys up there, so you should make up your mind and move on with the most.
Suppose you still follow up closely with advancement of Denovo and Biocartilage with BMAC, et. Will you make a move. What about going back to the conventionally proven track for OATS that people usually taken in the past after MF.
Anyway, it is good knowing you can play some activities.
Hope thing will go better for you.

Offline ocdnetadmin

  • Administrator
  • Full Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 171
  • admin
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #6 on: February 26, 2018, 02:59:40 AM »
Thanks John. I never considered OATS because my doctor at the time didn't want to do it. It involves taking cartilage from your knee which to me didn't seem like a very smart idea. Thank god we now have much better surgeries to choose from such as Denovo or grafts.

I'm seeing a growing number of people in here choose Denovo. I think I may have to go that route in the next few years as my ankle starts to slowly weaken.

Offline designer

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 3
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #7 on: May 08, 2018, 06:49:48 AM »
Damn, this thread was a roller coaster, playing - hurting - playing again - hurting again. Very happy for you that you've managed to have some fun on the court. From time to time I join my buddies as the goal keeper in football just to have some fun and say fuck the OCD, but yeah I usually feel it the next day.

I remember reading your story back when I first joined and it really left an impact on me. I think it's really important that people consider their state of affairs and mental health before going through with the surgery because I know that was one of my biggest reasons for opting out initially, I was at a weird stage in my relationship and career where I really thought the long recovery and the pain would knock me into a depression.

Anyways, thanks for sharing and keep us posted on your life. And thanks again for starting this forum!

Offline pds

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 113
    • View Profile
Re: Alan - Forum Creator's Thread
« Reply #8 on: May 09, 2018, 08:30:05 PM »
Alan -- Thanks for creating this forum. I've been dealing with OCD for 10+ yrs (3x surgeries, maybe more coming) and just found this. It's great to have a forum to share info and hear the stories of others who are dealing with similar things. I feel like this comment you made could be word for word something I would say: "Ankle still feels quite weak. That was almost 10 years ago and I just kinda get by in life. I didn't run or jump for all those years after the microfracture because my ankle just couldn't handle it. Thank god I could walk but if it was long distances and if i was carrying something heavy my ankle got really iffy and sore." That sucks that you're going through that, but it's good to know that I'm not the only one in this boat. So thanks for sharing.

-Paul